Manorama Choudhury is the author of ‘Ashtanayika-tatwa O kabita’ in the Odia language, a research based book that explores various romantic moods of women as described in Natyashastra supported by her classical and modern poems. A homemaker, passionate poet, and compassionate philanthropist from Massachusetts. A few of her poems have been adapted into songs and videos.
INDIA New England News: What does love mean to you?
Manorama Choudhury: At its core, love is pure and simple bliss within the heart, yet it becomes complex and subjective when entwined with worldly experiences. It encompasses emotions such as affection, care, and devotion.
INE: In the context of giving or receiving love, some say love can only be given. Do you agree or not and why?
MC: What goes around comes around. I believe in the notion that what we give in terms of love often comes back to us. I do agree, to some extent, that love is all about giving and is expressed through unconditional acceptance, stirring positive emotions at the receiving end. This dynamic interaction contributes to a mutually enriching experience.
INE: If you must choose between love and trust, what would you choose and why?
MC: Choosing between love and trust depends on personal values and experiences. Some may prioritize trust as foundational to maintain societal order, while others see love as essential for a fulfilling experience. Love is a feeling that can come and go, so I prefer trust.
INE: What is the lifespan of romantic love?
MC: The lifespan of romantic love is as varied as individuals and relationships themselves. In youth, it may be driven by physical attraction, while with age, it often transforms into a deep, felt companionship. The experience can evolve, deepen, or change over time. Additionally, the enduring nature of desire when faced with limited access holds true in romance, suggesting that unfulfilled wishes can contribute to the longevity of romantic feelings.
INE: Do you still believe in love the way you had imagined when you were a teenager or in your early 20s?
MC: At teenage adolescence, love is often hijacked by hormones. The definition of love and romance at that age is totally different and may demand physical bonding. I feel that is short lived. With life experiences personal beliefs about love may evolve and mature to nonphysical bonding. Perspectives on love often shift with time. I still believe in the idea of pure romance which can be felt at any age.
INE: Does marriage change the equation of love and why?
MC: Marriage significantly influences the dynamics of love, creating an intricate connection with care and affection. But it also adds expectations from each other to the dimension which changes the equation. Over time, distinguishing love from genuine concern becomes challenging. While marriage introduces stability and commitment, sustaining love demands continuous efforts from both partners.
INE: What is the secret of romantic marriage?
MC: The essence of a romantic marriage is often rooted in communication, mutual respect, and the ongoing efforts to understand and support each other. However, from my viewpoint, the notion of a truly romantic marriage diminishes over time, especially in the face of life’s evolving duties and responsibilities, even in love marriages.
INE: Your favorite Bollywood romantic songs?
MC: It is hard to chose from so many romantic Bollywood songs but here are two of favorites.
- –Abhi na jao chod kar ke dil abhi bhara nahin.
- -Moh moh ke dhage teri ungaliyon mein ja uljhi.
