New Delhi– Dating can be difficult, and who does one turn to for advice or even a shoulder to cry on when things get tough? Friends are often our designated confidantes; however, there is one person in your corner who you can turn to for advice based on experience, understanding, and unconditional support — your mother!
Mothers, with their own wealth of life experience, know best — even when it comes to dating advice — they can be a guiding force in their children’s dating journeys.
This Mother’s Day, inspiring Indian mothers whose daughters’ made the first move and met their partners on Bumble, share their thoughts on online dating as well as advice on how to keep an open mind and communicate clearly with your children.
* Educate your mum about online dating: Sunidhi and Kushal both weren’t strong believers of online dating, but as fate would have it, they found each other on Bumble! Anita, Sunidhi’s mother, was a bit hesitant about online dating to begin with. She mentioned that, “There is a learning curve that can only be brought forward by children. With time and better knowledge, I think parents will be more receptive and confident about their kids finding love online. I feel it’s important for mothers to instill the basic principles of a relationship and the foundation on which it lies. I have talked about my learnings in life with my daughter which I feel has helped her choose the right person. As Sunidhi grew up, we became better friends, and it became easier for her to come and talk to me about her feelings.”
* Have faith in your children: After their parents insisted that they find their partners, Aradhana and Vinay joined Bumble. As two people looking for marriage, they instantly hit it off and got married within a year-and-a-half of dating! Her mother Vandana Jagota, who was really excited when she came to know that Aradhana found her one on Bumble, shares that, “Mums can be allies to their children’s dating lives by trusting them. They should have full confidence that the children will do what is right and good for them. Children should consider their mum as a friend and have an open conversation about their dating lives. There should be no hesitation either from the children’s or parent’s side.”
* Create a safe environment: As they say, when it’s right, it’s right! Sanya also met Utkarsh on Bumble under similar circumstances. Within three months of dating, they were engaged to each other. Shabnam Kundra, Sanya’s mother, says that most parents tend to get nosy with their questions, but she has always ensured that her daughter felt comfortable discussing her relationships and heartbreaks ever since she was a teenager. “If you are a mother who started this practice late, always remember that patience is the key to nurturing any relationship.”
Take one step at a time, start with spending more time together, going out for lunch and dinners, or talking about any TV series which is trying to break taboos. When the time is right, take the next step, and ask if they are seeing someone. You cannot push them at any cost, as it might just delay the process even more.
Trusting your mother to be your friend and ally may give you the confidence to embark on your dating journey with renewed vigour. Take this Mother’s Day as the perfect opportunity to begin this new chapter of friendship that you will cherish for the rest of your lives. (IANS)